Alex Knowles: Ultimate British Wrestling Cambourne

Alex Knowles

Hope this reflection finds everyone well and again a huge thank you to so many of you who turned out at Cambourne last Saturday. Stay tuned as our next show will be announced very soon, but for now – here is my reflection on everything UBW from last Saturdays event…
Lights, camera, action. If UBW unleashed in Cambourne last Saturday was a film then the audience might have well been littered with little golden statues. A superb evening of entertainment that has gone down a storm with the Cambridgeshire crowd and guaranteed we will be back very soon. The main event wasn’t only the talented wrestlers on display nor was it I, taking this opportunity to run around the room giving high fives to Hulk Hogan’s entrance music. It was you. You the fans and your desire. The atmosphere you created and the fact that you were here to support and enjoy a well run production.

Andy Hammer and Ricky Cortis started us off with a hell of an opener. Cortis showing why he is UBW’s threat from the sky as he pinged his way over the top rope and from turnbuckle to turnbuckle evading Hammers offence. However, like a steaming 500 ton freight train, when The Hammer hit he did more than just clip Cortis wings, He grounded him. The fans could only watch on as Hammer constantly pounded Cortis with a iron fist as Lulu reluctantly cheered on her boyfriend / master from ringside. Pretty girl and seemed very intelligent – the little we get to see when she’s not locked up in The hammers clutch. What she sees in him? I don’t know. Yet hope springs eternal as Cortis somehow managed to dodge a Tiger bomb and wrap up his opponent for a famous win. The crowd were delighted, yet Lulu bore the brunt of Hammers rage on the way back to the locker room.

Kolt Kelly was up next and the brash, arrogant little man did what he is best known for – antagonize EVERYONE! Out for his UBW debut came the talented British superstar RJ Singh to make sure the only thing Kelly would be ‘winning’ was the first shower. If Kelly’s technical ability was as smooth as his tongue then I have no doubt Famous’ title would have a serious threat to it. If other rival promotions have Sierra, Hotel, India, Echo, Lima, Delta the we at UBW have our very own Charlie, Hotel, Alpha, Victor. Once again the only opponent Kolt can’t seem to master is his own ego. Singh was quicker, and took advantage of Kelly’s crowd glorification to hit the top turnbuckle and crush him. That’s 2 loses on the bounce now. Will it be third time lucky at our next show? Big mention to Chris as well who refereed his first UBW match. If he continues at that level of professionalism I’m going to have to look at investing in a pipe and slippers.

In a shocking twist from last month’s tag match in ST Albans the Dog of War (Sween) came out on his own with The Mastermind Paul James. Where was Braddock? Apparently Braddock was ‘injured’ due to a mistake I (the ref) made when calling the last bout which The New Breed won by a clever thinking and timely roll up. Anyway that aside, the Mastermind had come up with another partner to join Sween on the night. No other than Kruiz. You can imagine how as a ref my heart sank. If Paul James and Kruiz boarded the Ark together it would be as a pair of snakes. Having to watch Kruiz like a hawk in the ring, The cowardly James on the Apron and the brutal Sween reigning blow after blow on the new Breed was not an easy task. Another thrilling encounter however by the fan favorites – Ashe and Kurve as their experience showed working together like a fine oiled machine and hitting back at their enemies. So it was a shock to me to turn round (after sending James to the back for constant interference) to see The New Breed on their backs and Sween lying on top for the pin. It appears a solid blow to the eye is what knocked Ashe off his feet. Very unlike him to get caught out I must say.

After the interval another of UBW’s rising stars took to the ring as the crowd went ecstatic. Toxicity was in the air as the fans chanted Toxic, Toxic, Toxic as they waited for the painted pulsating superstar. I really feared for Rob Toxic in this match and I have mentioned this on more than one occasion on previous reflections. Going up against Kruiz who (like it or not) is one of the best in the locker room is hard enough. But who knows what tricks he had in store? If Toxic were a power station then Cambourne was his plutonium as he fed on the young fans hopes and dreams to try and slay his opponent. In an attempt to blind Toxic, Kruiz assaulted him by spitting water in his face and then wiping Ref’s Relish (the Randy Corton edition which is fantastic with cheese, French bread and a warm Chianti) before I gave Kruiz his final warning. Rob hit Kruiz with everything he had from the ground and the air, but one brash move to many and the skilled veteran said good night with a super kick to the young man’s head.

Before heading into the 13 man Battle Royal for the Cambourne Cup there was the small matter of the UBW title match where we saw the Champ Rich N Famous defend his title against his nemesis from the last show Mark Massa. Both men entered the ring in an orderly fashion but it didn’t take long until they were both brawling on the outside of the ring once again. Both of these big guys going hammer and tongs at each other yet neither giving any ground. The match flowed from the outside to the inside of the ring with Famous clearly looking for revenge on the vicious attack on his knee by Massa in St Albans which nearly wrecked his title opportunity with Kruiz. For my money the champ was struggling against the beast that is Massa but he (Massa) does not have the one true quality needed to overthrow the Champ. And that is heart. Famous countered and was getting the better of the challenger when everything went black. I can’t tell you what happened and I am not going to point fingers at Massa but somehow I found myself as a wafer thin slice of ham between a very manly sandwich. I remember Famous charging at Massa in the corner but then squashing me while I felt the brutal breath of the beast on my neck. I’m down and when I come too I see Rich covering for the win and Kruiz also on his back on the canvas! Where did he spring from this time?

Finally the 13 man battle royal for the Cambourne Cup! The fans were in for a treat as all their favorite stars hit the ring with one thing in mind – being the last man standing. Kruiz, Sween, Kelly, Taylor Made and Hammer all hit the ring before the crowd once again got to there feet for their heroes, Captain Cassius, Chopper, The Breed, Rob Toxic, RJ Singh, Ricky Cortis and Jay West. A superb battle erupted and it wasn’t long before Taylor Made was sent packing along with Rob Toxic. The nearly 7 foot giant, Chopper was clearing house as Captain Cassius and Jay West worked together to keep their spots. In the end though they too were sent marching to the back as Kolt Kelly and Andy Hammer worked together to chop down the big man. A sneaky punch then to Kelly on the apron saw Hammer as the first winner of the Cambourne cup. So a superb show and much to live up to when we return next time.

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